Daddy Plays Guitar Pop talk with a stay at home dad

Stay At Home Dad and Breast Feeding Among Strangers

My daily trips to the park often yield wonderful life changing experiences for my daughter and myself. New words, new feats of strength, coordination, and new friends.  My daughter is now entering her age of exploration which often means walking up to other children and parents to see what they're doing or what toys they have. One such occasion brought me face to face with a new adventure for me...public breast feeding. I must be clear on this, I  have no problem with breast feeding, my wife breast fed and I have seen other women breast feed first hand. It is great, healthy and so very natural. However, I  was mentally unprepared for the situation I had yet to encounter, until last week, one on one conversation/breast feeding.

My daughter had made some "friends" at the park. The group she infiltrated consisted of four women and their children, ages 18 months to 4 years old. This was a very gracious pack of mothers, who welcomed my daughter and myself to sit on their blanket and play with their childrens blocks.

"Okay." , I thought, I'll sit and chew the fat.

We were hanging out for over an hour, we discussed pre school and diets, etc...

Somewhere around this time as I was having a one on one with the "leader" of the group, a mother with a 4 year old son and a 2 1/2 year old daughter, a shirt was lifted by the aforementioned daughter and feeding time had begun. I was sitting about 3 feet from this woman and making eye contact, caught up in some discussion of carrots, ...BAM!!! Wow!!! Right there...boob town filling station.

Mentally, I was doing a few sommersaults to the effect of, "Alright, this is normal, I'll just keep speaking to her as if  her boobs are not exposed and in my line of sight. Her child is hungry and this is how she feeds her. No reason to get uncomfortable. I am a liberal thinking man who is meeting new people, and sometimes these things occur. She is clearly not uncomfortable by this so why should I be."

I don't care how liberal a man is, when a breast is exposed in that close proximity, your game is thrown off. It is nature, (the other way), the mind goes haywire for a minute. Ping ponging back and forth between maturity and adolescence.  The volley went something like this,

"Oh. Breastfeeding, how beautiful nature is."

"Boobs are great, just look at em."

"What are you 13 years old, this is not peep-land."

"How come parenthood means we have to lose our appreciation of admiring a pair of breasts?"

"You are an idiot,  be mature and look at the ground."

"But there are no breasts on the ground."

You get the idea. It was difficult for a little while. I did succumb to a form of admiration for the mother. I don't know if I could be that selfless...and for that long...2 1/2 years...wow.

But, eventually the lunch counter closed, and her daughter took a nap. The women eventually left with their kids and my daughter and I went on to enjoy the rest of the day. No harm, no foul.

So what did I learn? I'm not sure. It was sort of like looking at the sun for the first time...disorienting at first, but eventually you learn not to look directly at it. Wait...that came out wrong. I mean in time I became desensitized by it. No big deal? I guess not. Just another day at the park for stay at home Dad.